Who am I today?

Here’s the thing. I played around with having this title be the question like you see it now or as a definitive statement reading “Who I am today.” Well unless I get to the bottom of this post and decide that I found a definitive answer to my question I truly don’t think I can make a firm statement as to who I am today. Everyday, who I am changes. Some days I am an inter, a friend, a sister, a daughter, a restaurant hostess. Some days I am a combination. Just something to think about when I start my day, what role am I in and who am I going to be?

The last few years have been major in my life. I moved out of my house to go to college, I made all new friends, I broke up with my long-time boyfriend, and I entered the business world with different intern opportunities. So what does this mean? In short, I am a single college student who is learning about her future career. All of the changes in my life have been easy…NOT. Oh, I wish that I could say that I didn’t haven’t anxiety filled nights and was uncertain about myself but that isn’t realistic.

Many people told me to be myself. Great advice once I figure out who “myself” is. I am smart, bold, funny, creative, a problem solver, and strong. I know that for a fact. I know that I am able to adapt to situations and am open to change. While I am not sure what that means for my future, being confident in what traits I know are unique and characterize me helps to begin the definition of who am I.

I challenge all of you to think about the defining features in your character and make them present in your every day. It’ll help tackle the daunting question of who you are today.

40 days of Writing

Today marks day 2 of lent and I finally figure out what I’m going to give up. Traditionally people give up bread, chocolate, soda or other things that they probably shouldn’t be addicted to anyway. A friend of mine told me to give up my attitude, lol, which I might try but that may not last for 40 days. Instead I plan on giving up giving up. You read that right, I am going to spend 40 days making no excuses on why I don’t have time to write a little snip-bit in this blog that can be about anything. I plan on giving up my give-up attitude about my writing. I do have some ideas on what I will write about but I think it’ll have to be a day to day thing about my day. I am going to try my hardest to keep this up and I hope by the end of these 40 days I will be a better writer and have more motivation to write blog posts more often… wish me luck!

2017 Beauty Routine (updated)

Well the end of 2016 left me in a beauty dilemma. New Year’s Eve Eve I was getting ready to go out with my family and *CRUNCH* my eyelash curler snapped off a section of my eyelashes!! I couldn’t believe what was happening and I honestly don’t know how I didn’t break down in tears. Many people told me that eyelash curlers were bad for you and Miley Cyrus even had an issue with her eyelashes being cut off a few years ago and nothing changed by habits… silly me! I came out of a color guard season where every Friday and Saturday I would wear false lashes and caked on performance makeup which looked nice but KILLED my skin. I had skin drier than ever and I broke out all the time and apparently my eyelashes became dry and brittle. The few weeks preceding the incident I changed my routine from a good routine to a lazy one that consisted of makeup wipes and that was it. Since then I have sworn off makeup… for now. Believe me I will still be wearing it but in my everyday Monday to Friday life I won’t be wearing any. So far for January I’ve given myself 4 days when I can cheat because of events but my goal is to go barefaced as often as possible.

With that being said here is what my new beauty routine has changed to…

• Washing my face nightly using  Purity Made Simple One-Step Facial Cleanser by Philosophy with my Mia 2 Skin Cleansing System by Clarisonic, which I own in pink,
• Moisturizing my face with either Renewed Hope in a Jar by Philosophy or Skin Smoothing Cream by Dermalogica
• Putting a glob of  Vaseline on my eyelashes and lash lines to help moisturize them
• And last but not least drinking a liter or 2 of water a day. I say liter because my water intake mainly comes from seltzer which keeps you just as hydrated as water would!

I think I’m saving money by not constantly buying makeup and my skin looks a lot healthier. It is strange seeing myself without makeup, especially in the winter when I’m so pale, but I’ve gotten use to it after a couple weeks. I would recommend this change to everyone especially if you’re looking to cleanse for a month even. I can definitely say I’m more confident after this change because I’ve learned that no one is going to notice if you’re wearing makeup or not and even if they have no one has made any comments to me about it. I wouldn’t care what they thought anyway and neither should you.

What I learned from 2016

2016 was a crazy whirlwind and like most people I couldn’t wait for midnight to strike and for a new year to happen. A lot has happened in the year, both positive and negative, which has given 2016 the title of worst year ever. I like to try and see it from a different light and think about all the lessons I learned which has helped me go into 2017 feeling good about myself and feeling more content than ever. I thought I’d share some of those lessons /advice/tips to life with you..

1. It’s okay to be stressed out
2. Sometimes the best of friends need a break apart
3. Do more things that make you happy
4. Don’t be afraid to do something different in your life
5. It’s never too late to be yourself
6. Never give up on your goals (e.x. I’m back to blogging)
7. The less time I spend on my phone the better I feel
8. Surround yourself with loved ones more
9. Make time for yourself
10. Buy less expensive things rather than more cheap things
11. Live in a clean room/house/dorm/office
12. Think more positively

All of these things are relatively simple but I was constantly telling myself subconsciously that I shouldn’t go out and I shouldn’t do what I wanted to and every time I talked myself down or out of an activity the worse and worse I felt. I can honestly say that while I hate walking up at 6:00 every morning, I wake up feeling better and having better days. This feeling started happening in late November when I started making more time for my friends, family and myself. The rest of my life kind of worked out from there. It’s a lot simpler than we let ourselves believe. There were people I wish I didn’t leave behind but I will always cherish the happy times I spent with them and I hope they all do well. Overall, I hope everyone has a happier, healthier and a better 2017 because after the last year the world had I think we all deserve it.

Summer Jams

Here are my favorites for summer 2k16:

• Red Dress by MAGIC!
• Sail Into The Sun by Gentlemen Hall
• Red Red Wine by UB40
• Santeria by Sublime
• Jamming by Bob Marley & The Wailers
• Dani California by Red Hot Chili Peppers
• Island In The Sun by Weezer
• CAN’T STOP THE FEELING by Justin Timberlake
• Lay You Down Easy by MAGIC! and Sean Paul
• PILLOWTALK by ZAYN
• I Took A Pill In Ibiza by Mike Posner
• Love Yourself by Justin Bieber

My favorite playlist on Spotify is Soak Up The Sun by Spotify. It has so many chill, poolside, summertime songs. Some of them are throw backs and some are newer. It’s a great playlist to relax to.

Nooks and Crannies

Every few years my family cleans out everything. We go into every nook and cranny that builds clutter and then get rid of most of it. There comes a point when even the sentimental things become totally unnecessary and wastes of space. This year I’ve decided my room needs a face lift: painting some things, reorganizing, the whole 9 yards. Before I could start the make over I needed to declutter. It is human nature to  clutter our lives and to save things but boy does it feel amazing walking into a space with nothing unnecessary. It has only been a few days since I did my first round of cleaning, yes it take multiple rounds to get rid of everything, and my mind already feels less cluttered. My physical space is lighter feeling so naturally my mind and spirit is lighter. I highly suggest that everyone has their own nook and cranny detox now that summer is in full swing. It feels amazing. It is the best detox someone could do. Currently I am in a stressful point in my life and my thoughts are so cluttered with what I have to do next that I don’t want to have to think about the past or material things. Since cleaning I even sleep better. So yeah, I would 100% recommend nooks and crannies cleaning.

Gripes about Makeup

I love makeup. I really really love makeup. It has been 5 months into the year and regained  my platinum status at ULTA. I can really only say good things about makeup. Makeup has saved me from myself. It just makes me feel better. I have makeup to thank for a lot of my confidence. BUT I do have one teeny tiny problem with it…. (Just to be clear, my problem is with the concept). I have friends, most of who are girls, and these friends wear makeup. We definitely have bonded over our love of makeup but I feel like it makes us judgmental. Maybe other people don’t have this problem, but I’ve noticed that we do so I’m sure others are this way too. I’ll see a post on instagram or twitter and if the slightest thing is off then I’ll comment in my head about it or send it to a friend and we’ll talk about it. I know there is makeup hate in the world and tons of comments are made. The problem I have with comments such as those is that makeup is suppose to bring up our confidence and make us feel better about ourselves. No one needs to wear makeup. I promise. Many girls think they need to. They don’t. If it’s not a necessity why is it treated like one? It should be a fun experience and something that brings the wearer joy.  Which is why comments like that don’t make sense to me! I can admit I’ve been guilty of makeup-shaming others and it makes me hate myself. I don’t understand why we need to do that to each other. Because of this I’d like to set a challenge. I challenge everyone to only encourage makeup wearers, no nasty comments, no makeup-shaming.

Happy

Everyone talks about happiness  like it is a tangible thing. Last time I checked you can’t hold happy. If someone tells you to go be happy you can’t just go to a store buy some happy and become happy. It took me until I was sad for me to have a revelation about happiness.

Let me tell you some backstory about why I’m writing this. This past year has been hard for me. Like really hard to the point that I just became so fed up and tired with what was going on. With feeling like a hundred bricks are weighing down on your shoulders comes sadness from being so done all the time. When friends or family would ask me what was wrong I would say “I’m just done.” While it was a true statement, it was a hard idea for some people to understand.

I had an idea when I was sitting in church (because all great epiphanies happen in a church). I looked down at my wrist while I was twiddling my thumbs and my two Lokai bracelets took my attention. For those who don’t know the Lokai bracelets have mud from the dead sea (lowest point on the earth) and water from the highest peak of Mt. Everest. This is when I saw the balance of good and bad. The dark mud of one bracelet was inline with the light water of the other. Not only did I see the balance but I could feel it too. What I took out of this was that we as people shouldn’t worry about being sad. We spend our time being upset and “done” with sadness. But why? It’s natural. It’s an emotion. Sadness happens. Just like how after a storm there is a rainbow, after a time of sadness comes happiness. So really the main point here is that happiness and sadness aren’t permanent! Why the heck should I or anyone else let people or silly things ruin happy.

If you’re experiencing happy then be full in because there is nothing worse than worrying about the next time we won’t be happy. No one deserves to take that away from you. Be happy when you’re happy and be sad when you need to be sad, maybe even cry a little. It might be bad energy, sadness that is, but it is bad energy leaving. It’s making more room for the happy times!

I know it is easier to say “Just don’t be sad!” But over time, the sad times won’t be so bad and the happy times will be even better. Don’t let someone take that away and don’t use your time being sad. If I had the choice, if it were up to me I can promise that I would wake up and be happy.

Goals

All of my years of school have taught me, or tried to teach me, time management skills. I will admit that having time management skills is an incredibly important skill but in my day to day life I don’t use it as often as maybe I should. I notice this most when I set a goal for myself. I don’t like planning ahead. Life is too unpredictable to plan far ahead except when I give myself a new goal. I say new goal because I am constantly setting new goals for myself, right now its a work out goal. In my head as soon as I set a goal I’m going to stick with it and never deviate. But we all know that won’t happen. And what is so wrong about not sticking to a goal? I feel like I’ve failed once I break from my perfect schedule and that I should just give up.

Well, for the record, I couldn’t be any more wrong. It is helpful to set a schedule but why can’t I deviate. Who or what is stopping me from saying, “I can’t do that right this minute”? Let me explain by using the example of exercising. In the beginning of the week I may decide to work out Sunday, Tuesday, Thursday and Saturday. And on each day I’m going to run 5 miles. If I wake up on Tuesday and decide I don’t want to run 5 miles then that’s okay. Maybe I only run 2 or 3. Or maybe I don’t run on Tuesday at all! I wake up Wednesday and decide I want to run. That’s okay! It’s okay to deviate from our goals based on feelings as long as we don’t give up. You can plan ahead but be able to change and when the change happens remember: it’s okay! Goals will always be reachable if you keep working towards them and if they’re not set in stone. There is a reason why very few people carve into stone anymore… it’s hard to change it. Don’t feel like change isn’t part of reaching a goal. If anything it’s the biggest part.

As I reread over what I had just written I realize it’s slightly scattered feeling and probably not the most grammatically correct. I think that’s fine. This blog is being started because I like to write and because I’m living life on a feeling. One day  I woke up and decided this is what I wanted to do so I did it. Today I am achieving my goal.